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Joined 1 year ago
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Cake day: August 1st, 2023

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  • My little piece of advice: you don’t have to think about the future, tomorrow, next week, they are all far off. Think about now, this hour, the next 5 minutes, or whatever stretch of time seems manageable. What do you do now? Cook dinner? Watch a show? Cry in the shower? The future might be scary and too much to manage now. You’ll handle it when you get to it. Now, you only have to think about right now.

    Verbena tea is calming and soothing. Lavender is relaxing. Green tea for me is a calming ritual.

    You got this. Maybe it doesn’t feel like it, but you only need to do one step, and you got that one step.



  • A lot depends on your mindset. In particular nowadays, we are constantly focused on the future. Everything is seen as a stepping stone towards something else. So naturally, happiness becomes a faraway goal: “I’ll be happy when that happens”, but as son as that is reached, a new goal appears. To be happy, you need to live in the present. Accept the limitations of it, and thrive on the rest. Not every situation allows for happiness, but most allow for at least some happiness.

    I also think that humans are social animals, so happiness should be found in the connections we have with others, friends, blood family and chosen family.


  • One day, I understood that my then-boyfriend was the real thing.

    Before him, I had a couple of good relationships. I was happy, but always wondered if I would have been better off on my own. The thought would pop up every couple of days, I would seriously consider it for a bit, then decide I was happier with them than in my own. Then my now husband showed up and we started dating.

    One day, some three-four months into this new relationship, I realized I never had that old thought. It just never crossed my mind for months that I should evaluate the relationship. We clicked on so many levels, he made me a better person because it made me want to be better.

    We got married “fast” for some external reasons and I never doubted that was the right choice. Since then, i don’t have to think about it: I know my life is so much better with him in it.




  • The Lord of the Rings trilogy, by Tolkien

    I return to it ever couple of years, always in bad times and often in good times too. Everyone is trying to do the best they can, contributing what they can. Only few characters are at all malicious. Emotions are deep and powerful, portrayed lightly. The whole story is a great collaboration where wildly different people overcome their differences to reach a single, all-encompassing goal.



  • I’m normally pretty good about falling asleep, but I have a bout of insomnia a while back, I’ll share what worked for me.

    Make it a ritual: every day do things in the same order. Don’t make it over complicated, but some 10 minutes to wind down by always performing the same actions in the same order. Example: brush teeth, select clothes for tomorrow, change in your pajamas, go to bed.

    Write down your recurring thoughts (this one was particularly useful to me): if there is a thought that you just can’t let go, write it down and assure yourself you’re not going to forget it, you are putting it aside for tomorrow. Then the next morning read what you wrote and consider it a minute.

    An a bonus:

    The bed is for sleeping: don’t do anything else other than sleeping in bed. If sleeping is not happening, give up, stroll around a minute, and try again in 5 minutes. (honestly, this one didn’t work for me, but maybe it works for you!)