I am an Indian and I have become hyperaware of the people and the culture that surrounds me and I am beginning to see the flaws in it. One of the flaws that trouble me the MOST is how most Indians behave when they encounter any authority figure (mostly higher class or “higher” caste or the wealthy or the bureaucrat class).
When an average Indian walks into a Government office with a corrupt bureaucrat in it, he begins treating himself as an insect, he is way too afraid and he is way too submissive and slavish, this doesn’t end here however, if you meet someone of a higher social status than yourself you become slavish and submissive there too and this happens every time an authority figure is in the room and even with people who think very highly of themselves(at their homes, with their families etc.,) I dress well and look somewhat well so once I had a guy who is my father’s age call me sir and use language which is reserved for “the higher classes”. This is not ok! I wish he had a spine, I don’t want to be him when I grow up, but I know he didn’t choose to be that way, it’s the environment he was brought up in and not being aware of one’s own slavishness.
I am not blaming my people, but I do detest the culture which caused this. And don’t be fooled, I am not an observer, I (used to) do this too and I hate this
It’s like our bones melt and our brain switches off and we become in our own eyes the lowest form of life on earth. Probably justifiably because the education we have received is subpar (counter-productive) in most cases. And you can’t think highly of yourself if you are capable of doing anything productive, but it’s not just that, it happens with those people who are productive members of the society, but to a lesser extent.
I have heard many Southern Asian countries are like this in this aspect. So, I was wondering how you treat authority in your culture and if you thought it was healthy. I would be very much interested if your culture is similar to mine and what you think might have caused it.
And most importantly, how do you think I can get rid of this disgusting habit, is it even possible in India? (fellow Indians jump in here)
edit: Thanks to everyone who replies! :)
Swede here, in general thw Swedes are very law abiding, there are plenty of laws and regulations that carries no punnishment, but they are still followed.
When I need to speak with say the tax authority, I call the general customer service number, and adopt a persona of positivity and friendlyness, I speak to them as a coworker that I need help from, this is simply because we are both trying to solve the issue.
When talking to my manager at work or even the CEO, we talk like coworkers, we joke, talk about the weekend and lunch recommendations. I know they are my managers, they know that I know that as well, there is no need to keep enforcing it in our day to day tasks.
Talking to Police is done politely and relaxed, I have never been mistreated, though I am white and clearly Swedish who lives a quiet life.
There is no higher authority in Sweden than Systembolaget.
also as a swedish person i think by far the most notable aspect is how level the playing field is when it comes to respect, primarily in schools and the like but even in other spaces.
its the norm that students and teachers are on first name basis and honorifics are almost never used anywhere. the plural 2nd person pronoun “ni” has largely fallen out of use in its other meaning as a singular 2nd person formal pronoun, being replaced with its informal counterpart “du” most of the time.
students and employees alike can freely and commonly do criticize and talk back to teachers and employers/bosses if theres a genuinely valid reason to do so and the general dynamic between different social positions is so relaxed to the point of it being fascinating. i think meeting the literal king of the country would for many people not warrant that big a change in behaviour other than obviously just being particularly nice.
as a result of this i think people have an easier time seeing each other as people rather than just as cogs of society, and being a person who struggles a lot with reading social cues its an enormous relief to so far in my professional life never had to worry a single time whether i should refer to someone as mr. or ms. or if i should be speaking in a particular register
That sounds really nice. As an American I try to live like that but it often is difficult in our culture
Back in 1967 Sweden had “Du-reformen”, a change to our language and popularize the second-person singular pronoun, “du”, as a universal form of addressing others in the Swedish language.
There is a wikipedia article anout it, and it is a bit interesting:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Du-reformen
Then we also have the law of “jante” which is deeply rooted in Swedish and Scandinavian culture:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Law_of_Jante
The informal laws sound harsh, but boils down to, “you are not better than us”, and it applies to everyone.
Jante should be taken with a pinch of salt, the main point of jante is to not act like you are better than anyone else.