Never hand a boomer your phone. Especially an elderly boomer, and especially if that boomer is your mother. They will always start swiping. It’s like their brain just deflates. Their eyes glaze over. They get this wide, tranquil smile, as if to say, “Hot dawwg! This boundless collection of photos I’ve been handed is going to be a real treat!”, and they just start swiping. They just start fucking swiping.
I apologize for any offense I may have caused, but I believe your presence here is no coincidence. You have to be the messenger. Please pass it along to the others via email chain letter, or perhaps more effectively, state that Mark Zuckerberg has changed the rules of Facebook and requires all users to automatically swipe when handed people’s phones. That should be effective in getting Aunt Joyce to do the exact opposite.
The other guy is right, I’m just goofing on the stereotype. You accessing Lemmy is plenty of proof that the stereotype is a bad generalization. Sorry for pissing you off!
Then they zoom out and start swiping. Just turn on Guided Access mode on iOS or Screen Pinning or App Pinning on Android. In those modes you can disable touch.
Never hand a boomer your phone. Especially an elderly boomer, and especially if that boomer is your mother. They will always start swiping. It’s like their brain just deflates. Their eyes glaze over. They get this wide, tranquil smile, as if to say, “Hot dawwg! This boundless collection of photos I’ve been handed is going to be a real treat!”, and they just start swiping. They just start fucking swiping.
My boomer mother swiped too far on her own phone when she was showing me something
Oh god no! Please…tell me it’s not what I think it is…
The fathercock
The progenitor penis
Daddick pic
The chronicles of daddick?
The gaping maw… of maw.
As a boomer fully versed in modern phone usage I resent this unwarranted collective slur.
Ok boomer
pooper
I apologize for any offense I may have caused, but I believe your presence here is no coincidence. You have to be the messenger. Please pass it along to the others via email chain letter, or perhaps more effectively, state that Mark Zuckerberg has changed the rules of Facebook and requires all users to automatically swipe when handed people’s phones. That should be effective in getting Aunt Joyce to do the exact opposite.
Pass it on yourself, I haven’t used FB in at least 10 years. I’m guessing you don’t eat avocado toast either. Stereotypes are stupid aren’t they.
Stereotypes are stupid, but also I believe that the user you’re replying to is being facetious and already making fun of the stereotypes.
The other guy is right, I’m just goofing on the stereotype. You accessing Lemmy is plenty of proof that the stereotype is a bad generalization. Sorry for pissing you off!
Just make every second image in your phone this GIF:
Get some Operant Conditioning in them.
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Just zoom in a little so it pans
Then they zoom out and start swiping. Just turn on Guided Access mode on iOS or Screen Pinning or App Pinning on Android. In those modes you can disable touch.