Edit: “getting closer to marriage” is about the whole journey starting from being completely single
Edit: if this shower thought is too confusing to be useful to you, then here is a quote that gives some of the same guidance, is simpler, less philosophical, but less broad: “Don’t waste your time chasing butterflies. Mend your garden, and the butterflies will come” - Mario Quintana
This assume nobody can reach their potential unless they marry. And that’s bogus. Anyone can reach their potential without a partner. Having a family is irrelevant to your human potential and self-actualization. Even most religion would disagree with your idea considering most use chastity and isolation as a means to reach enlightenment.
In practice, my shower thought has nothing of value to those who are not on that path, but I gave this comment some thought anyway.
Technically, reaching 100% of our earthly potential requires experiencing the highest level of earthly love and using our ability to reproduce. In practice, no one reaches 100%, and we probably can reach 99% without a spouse and kids.
Since I’m Catholic, I believe that in a religious vocation, earthly things are given up for supernatural things. In my post, I said “earthly” to exclude religious vocations and Heaven.
What about polyamorous people? They can’t reach it without several spouses then. How many are enough? Will a polyamorous person increase their happiness asymptomatically for each person they become partners with? What about aromantic people that don’t desire romantic relationships?
I for one think that my personal happiness ‘maximum’ can be increased with a spouse. But you really can’t make that judgement for others.