DMT clouds making them connect to the universe and lay down 4 minutes
Fentanyl dart gun
Anti-cop weapon.
High voltage contact shirt. You touch me, you fry
also good for making grilled cheese sandwiches
The best defense is avoidance. To that end, a personal time-travel / prognostication device that could both predict danger and chronoport you back to before danger was imminent would be the ultimate defense, though suppose not strictly a “weapon”.
Laser eyes.
Now you can just look at something you want to destroy without using your arms.
Telekinesis helmets.
Now you can just think about destroying something you can’t even see.
Foot held point shoot thing
Magical aura that reads intentions and zaps people. Diablo 2 paladin auras essentially.😺
Body odour
Or that guy from Mystery Men who farts.
personal satellite with Hatsune Miku licensed voice assistant for targeting and fire control. A few lasers of different frequency, a railgun, maybe some emergency snack pods with little chutes.
This is why I have cannons loaded with grapeshot in every room of my house. Never know when I’ll need to remove a thief from existence.
Safety is all about preparation.
A gun that shoots tiny missiles that aim at the attackers butthole and once they hit they release a jet of freezing water up their butt.
Personal forcefield with a shape of my choosing, activate either by s simple device or algorithmically based on external factors. Great for safety but also handy as an umbrella.
I’ve read somewhere and I’m not sure if it’s true that there is a device that can be inserted inside the vagina which will essentially bite the rapist’s penis and the only way to remove it without destroying the penis is via surgery.
I believe it’s called Rapex.
Self defense is a fantasy of control. If you want to eliminate threats to yourself rationally, eat more vegetables, take care of your mental health, and drive carefully.
Ah yes the infallible recipe to never be physically assaulted
the statistical recipe to lengthen your lifespan
Now that’s more accurate
I was more or less trying not to refer to weapons of mass destruction. Not implying self defense is virtuous.
Temporary blinding LED flash weapon, stink bombs, vomiting, reciting the Captain Ahab monologue from Moby Dick where he’s telling them to split their lungs with blood and thunder and crack their oars and backs.
Captain Ahab monologue
This one’s kind of cool. What about a voice modulator that makes it seems like your voice is their own internal monologue and you can disarm them by boring them to death or confusing them.
Something that makes me disappear instantly and teleports me to the pub down the street. Cold beer is better than hot fight.
What if it’s a bar fight
