• capybara@lemm.ee
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    29
    ·
    4 days ago

    Both of these posts are complaining about their accounts being banned, which happened because they (at least one of them) posted low effort questions and therefore got lots of downvotes and got automatically banned by a system meant to ban bots and trolls. The irony is that reddit has major problems with their automatic moderation which you yourself as an user is completely powerless to controll, e.g. recently when a massive amount of nsfw subreddits were banned for being unmoderated which they later admitted was erroneous.

    • Ledericas@lemm.ee
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      4
      ·
      edit-2
      4 days ago

      i doubt it was error on thier part, the subs happened to be the ones about trans and lgbt, and narcissim therapy , and around the time musk complained about whitepeople twitter. why only those and non of the controversial oens.

  • redsparks2025@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    34
    ·
    4 days ago

    I’ve noticed a rise of Bot Moderators on reddit and their AI is not very good. They pick up on certain words and not context. One banned me for 3 days for harassment but I was defending myself against someone that was being antagonistic against me. My appeal was rejected :(

    • Lazylazycat@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      5
      ·
      4 days ago

      It’s likely just keywords. I had a similar thing when the comment I left was quite clearly sarcasm. I messaged the mods and they said their automod couldn’t differentiate between sarcasm and ernest, and tough luck 🤷🏻‍♀️

    • Ledericas@lemm.ee
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      3
      ·
      4 days ago

      i got temp ban, because i reported too much, and or people they dint want me reporting. oh when you get temp ban/perma ban, if the same sub sees you again, even if your ban was lifted, it bans you again because it assumes your evading(it doesnt clear when your ban gets lifted in some cases)

  • brucethemoose@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    80
    arrow-down
    2
    ·
    edit-2
    4 days ago

    My beef with Lemmy:

    • It’s weighted towards politics
    • Not a lot of niche sub critical mass yet (though this is not its fault at all)
    • But holy moly, it’s a political purity test! Like, I think of myself as pretty socialist, way far off center, but I feel totally alone veering off certain topics or even acknowledging certain things! I’m (mostly) not getting banned, and I am not leaving, but still.
    • CancerMancer@sh.itjust.works
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      12
      arrow-down
      1
      ·
      4 days ago

      But holy moly, it’s a political purity test! Like, I think of myself as pretty socialist, way far off center, but I feel totally alone veering off certain topics or even acknowledging certain things! I’m (mostly) not getting banned, and I am not leaving, but still.

      I saw people advocating for damaging people’s Teslas and it was fucking stupid. Beyond the fact that many people are not in a position where they can just get rid of a car over political reasons, it is likely many or even the majority of Tesla owners do not vote Republican (conservatives have been much slower to adopt EVs): you’re very likely going to damage vehicles owned by totally innocent people.

      I own a non-Tesla EV but either way it would be excessively expensive to switch to another car on a whim, and I sure as hell am not going to deprive my family just because seeing my car’s brand hurts people’s feelings.

      • Ledericas@lemm.ee
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        2
        ·
        4 days ago

        that part is wierd, conservatives dont own EVS, PERIOD fox has been telling how evs are a }pansy liberal thing", cybertruck is anomaly though.

      • Lvdwsn@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        3
        ·
        4 days ago

        Agree with the sentiment, I feel like cybertrucks deserve an exemption though, agree or disagree?

          • Ledericas@lemm.ee
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            1
            ·
            4 days ago

            or it can damage you by slicing you in two, i heard one instantly cut a deer in half when it crashed into one.

        • CancerMancer@sh.itjust.works
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          2
          arrow-down
          2
          ·
          4 days ago

          If this is your form of protest at least target someone who has materially contributed to this state of affairs, and by that I don’t mean random Republican voters.

          • pulsewidth@lemmy.world
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            1
            arrow-down
            1
            ·
            3 days ago

            People who have materially contributed to this state of affairs Republican voters

            This Venn diagram is a circle.

    • jamie_oliver@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      8
      ·
      4 days ago

      For the moment, I just don’t engage in political discussion on Lemmy. It is way to extreme for me in general. It makes sense tho that those who don’t feel their opinions fit anywhere else (or get them banned etc.) gather in a place that allows for freer discussion, which I think is a good thing really.

      And also just posting about niche music makes me happier than getting angry online so… That’s been a good motivation.

      • CancerMancer@sh.itjust.works
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        3
        ·
        edit-2
        4 days ago

        Honestly I think your approach is closer to the ideal: it’s pretty poisonous to the mind if most of the content you take in is political in nature. You need to explore other stuff too, broaden horizons and all that.

        I’ve been learning how to design parts with CAD software and 3D print it. Also got a home server going to host games and media, among other things. These hobbies keep me sane, and that’s what I’m ultimately getting at: people need to get a hobby that isn’t about being mad on the internet.

        Also instead of just whining on the internet, its far more effective to engage in local politics and build up a base of people there than hoping that “someone” will do “something” about the whole country. That “someone” has to come from somewhere: create the grassroots that can be the base from which change springs.

      • Ledericas@lemm.ee
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        1
        ·
        4 days ago

        in reddit you have to walk on eggshells when your in those subs, even if your “agreeing with everyone else”, one simple misconstruement will get you banned.

    • Blackmist@feddit.uk
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      9
      arrow-down
      2
      ·
      4 days ago

      Lemmy Leftists feel like that old Emo Philips joke at times.

      Apparently anyone not wanting to live in a grey soviet tower block and have all their worldly possessions be redistributed by the state is a “fucking Lib”

    • ad_on_is@lemm.ee
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      2
      ·
      3 days ago

      Lucky you… I managed to get banned once, for not being “left” enough. So I just don’t engage in specific kind of topics anymore.

      • brucethemoose@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        1
        ·
        edit-2
        3 days ago

        I’ve gotten banned somewhere for ostensibly malicious ninja editing, can’t even remember the community, but I do remember the topic. I dared clarify some factual thing.

        But it wasn’t part of a particular bandwagon of hate, so no dice.

    • feedum_sneedson@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      4
      ·
      4 days ago

      I got banned from the Star Trek Memes sub, or something, for very mild trolling. I don’t even remember what earned it, I think I said I can’t get my head around an animated Star Trek and can’t accept it as canon or something, and then the trolling was just me doubling down on that opinion (which is an actual opinion). People do love their fandoms.

      • Ledericas@lemm.ee
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        3
        ·
        4 days ago

        star trek is wierd, theres like 2 types of fans, the old trek and the nutrek crowd, the nutrek crowd is wierd becuase the series that came out since 09 sucks balls.

          • Ledericas@lemm.ee
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            1
            ·
            edit-2
            3 days ago

            i feel like it could be a better series if the actors were given better lines, and dint act like robots and dint try to use current issues that mirrors the plot. i do like prodigy lower decks more. picard is just not good, kinda lazy in the end too.

            star trek series, at least the old suck for the first 2 seasons, but it gets better, nutrek just gets worst overtime. snw tries to fix that though, but they shouldnt use the same styles as the other 2.

            • brucethemoose@lemmy.world
              link
              fedilink
              arrow-up
              1
              ·
              2 days ago

              The SNW characters themselves are interesting though. Like, I can’t remember a single character from what little I watched of Discovery, many of Picard’s new ones were forgettable and so on, but I like all of SNW’s.

              And I like the cast.

              It needs better episode-to-episode writing, sure.

              • Ledericas@lemm.ee
                link
                fedilink
                English
                arrow-up
                1
                ·
                2 days ago

                yea, someone said in a youtube video, they look like plastic dolls with botox trying to talk in snw. they definitely need more emotional expressions, and stop following kurtzman and discovery tropes. Picard couldve been better, if they stopped dropping the last seasons arcs , like with discovery. they needed to develop it further, and using material lifted from memory wiki pages and the books.(borg alliance, rogue changelings, time travelling borg(not related to first contact) should give those book some credit.

      • PlainSimpleGarak@lemmings.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        4
        arrow-down
        1
        ·
        4 days ago

        I had my comments deleted by some authoritarian nerd mod on one of those star trek communities for shitting on Discovery. Apparently, by having a negative opinion, I wasnt creating a welcoming atmosphere.

        • Ledericas@lemm.ee
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          3
          ·
          edit-2
          4 days ago

          STD was such a garbage show, how did people find it good also there were continuity problems too , kurtzman abandoned the klingons look, and thier cloak behind, because he couldnt explain it.

          • PlainSimpleGarak@lemmings.world
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            2
            ·
            4 days ago

            If memory serves, there was an episode, when they were in the 32nd century, where they said they couldn’t jump (spore drive) while cloaked. Then, in the same episode (or one soon after) they did exactly that. Can’t even follow their own rules because the show is a joke to them.

            But apparently in some spaces all opinions must be positive ones.

            • Ledericas@lemm.ee
              link
              fedilink
              English
              arrow-up
              1
              ·
              3 days ago

              STD also sorts of continuity issues, cloaking and klingons appearances in the first seasons, never explained, this was pre-balance of terror, when klingons finally get thier cloak from the romulans. they dint use the "spore drive less in the later seasons, because how silly the animations look to the fans. then fans noticed the females only crew in the later seasons, they replaced all the men, whats the explanation in that.

        • spill_scouring@lemmy.ca
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          2
          ·
          4 days ago

          Apparently, by having a negative opinion, I wasnt creating a welcoming atmosphere.

          Jeez, some mods have never heard of the concept of toxic positivity

        • pulsewidth@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          1
          ·
          3 days ago

          Ah, just what the Federation would aspire to: the silencing of any critical thought by undemocratically-installed secret leaders. Really does seem like the mod is a fan of NuTrek retcons.

          (Secret because the mod log is usually obfuscated to users, so they don’t even know which mod deleted their comment to appeal the decision)

          • Ledericas@lemm.ee
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            1
            ·
            3 days ago

            i mostly watched the nutrek clips, and thats why the “nutrek” fans think.

    • lmmarsano@lemmynsfw.com
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      4
      ·
      4 days ago

      It’s scary until you notice you don’t get banned for disagreeing & challenging their dumbassery (as long as you follow the rules), unlike reddit where the slightest wrong move & it’s BAN BAN BAN. Fuck that place.

      It also helps to check which instance a post comes from & adjust your expectations accordingly.

      • Ledericas@lemm.ee
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        2
        ·
        edit-2
        4 days ago

        currently on reddit the slightest misconstrued of your comment will get you banned, my favorite is always “harassment and hate”. i was in the gym sub, and someone qouted machelenny as someone “that naturally achieved that look” from isaip, and responded with "roids and juiced up. instant ban, and you contact the mods for a whole month.

        • lmmarsano@lemmynsfw.com
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          1
          ·
          3 days ago

          To compound the situation, the reporting process against moderators is hidden from view & a joke, and they practically prohibit any place to openly share notes on bad moderators, so users can’t collectively gather compelling evidence, organize, and condemn bad moderators.

          Moderator Code of Conduct: Rule 3:

          As a moderator, you cannot interfere with or disrupt Reddit communities, nor can you facilitate, encourage, coordinate, or enable members of your community to do this.

          Interference includes:

          • Enabling or encouraging content that showcases when users are banned or actioned in other communities, with the intent to incite a negative reaction.

          Again, fuck that place.

      • Cosmic Cleric@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        1
        ·
        4 days ago

        It also helps to check which instance a post comes from & adjust your expectations accordingly.

        Fundamentally, Reddit has (in the Past) better moderation, and theirs is lousy.

        (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0)

        • Ledericas@lemm.ee
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          1
          ·
          3 days ago

          now its auto-moderating for the large, ones and overmoderation everywhere else.

    • nerv@lemmynsfw.com
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      5
      ·
      4 days ago

      It’s expected. Right now, it is becoming a safe space for political dissidence. As sentiment pools and gathers mass, things tend to get towards the polar opposites and revolt breeds more revolt. Anything less than total agreement is viewed sideways.

    • burgerpocalyse@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      3
      ·
      4 days ago

      i argue that there arent really any niche communities. if I see a site with slow and limited posts, and 0 comments on most of those posts, can I really call that a community? i like video games and furry stuff. the video game and furry stuff sites have next to nothing on them. apparently the only ‘geeks’ here are Linux users who only talk about Linux distros or tankies who hate everyone and everything

      • brucethemoose@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        2
        ·
        4 days ago

        Agreed.

        I need to force myself to post/comment more in these subs though. Like I am trying to keep an eye on /c/thelastairbender for instance, but there are more.

    • irelephant 🍭@lemm.eeOP
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      12
      ·
      4 days ago

      I agree, reddit is so stagnant. I didn’t join in its prime by any means, but the place is so different since 2023. Thats what booting all the competant mods and going public does.

      • Ledericas@lemm.ee
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        2
        ·
        edit-2
        4 days ago

        seems to be worst now, although i do enjoy nottheonion and some politics.news on occasion it got really tiresome to see it all the time,and the ragebaiting, that you can get potential bans from. you can however filter out problematic subs from appearing on the feed. only works if your in r/all though.

    • rumba@lemmy.zip
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      5
      ·
      4 days ago

      Reddit bailed out people who were unhappy with digg 2.0 then they slowly went all corporate and ended up being the same damn thing.

      I worry that in a couple years time, some corpo will start an instance, hoover up everyone with custom style and features then slowly defederate and leave us undertraveled.

      • WhatAmLemmy@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        45
        arrow-down
        5
        ·
        edit-2
        5 days ago

        I’ve been lurking reddit lately, to see what propaganda the normies in the US are exposed to, and I found this thread fucking hilarious.

        Every comment is complaining about how this will be the death of reddit. None of them realize Reddit already died years ago, and they’re just getting high off the ashes.

        • PlainSimpleGarak@lemmings.world
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          12
          arrow-down
          4
          ·
          4 days ago

          Using “normies” unironically is one of the reasons Lemmy is a huge turn off. Normal people don’t talk like that, and it makes you look stuck up.

        • Ledericas@lemm.ee
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          1
          ·
          4 days ago

          that sub used to be good, til it got astroturfed during the election month, its more or less a politics clone sub, with a hint of tech whining. i got “reported” for reporting too much people. trying to eliminate the spam on your sub.

      • Ledericas@lemm.ee
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        1
        ·
        4 days ago

        no wonder they wanted api gone as well, it allowed people to ban evade, since its not using the site directly.

      • Pamasich@kbin.earth
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        0
        ·
        4 days ago

        This really isn’t true. Specific subreddits do, because their mods want to buddy up to the admins. With OP’s search settings, I do get one of the posts they got (only one though), and most of the results are drowned out by posts about some guy called Lemmy. But sorting by New, there’s plenty of results even from today and the past week. Subreddits announcing their fallback instance, a canadian subreddit discovering lemmy.ca, people asking questions about Lemmy. Lemmy-specific subreddits also show up without a problem. And everything I saw, except for that one post from OP’s image, was positive about it.

        I think people who have fully left Reddit are falling for confirmation bias when they hear that a post got removed for mentioning Lemmy. While plenty are still up despite doing the same. It’s either because of the other contents of the post, or because of the subreddit it was posted in. If it was about promoting Lemmy alone, all posts that promote Lemmy would be gone, which isn’t the case.

        • Ledericas@lemm.ee
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          1
          ·
          edit-2
          4 days ago

          i had heard in a forum site that there was a mod that knows reddit admins, a direct line of communication to them, and he was discussing the levels of shadowbanning tiers. apparently shadow bans has tiers, 4 and 5 being the lowest, and its considered a temp “ban” while one is for the botters/evaders who make multiple accounts, which is usually 1 year to a perma ban. and ban filters, are supposed to have 1 year limit for the most severe, ban evaders, but they seem to have changed it this year.

          also the most annoying this, is mods can crossban you for just visiting a controversial sub.

      • skillissuer@discuss.tchncs.de
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        42
        arrow-down
        1
        ·
        edit-2
        5 days ago

        they made a post, got tons of downvotes, then complained about downvotes which also got downvoted, got caught by automod because of downvotes, appealed, got unbanned, then deleted account or got purged because nothing even shows in modlog. the account was on sjw, posts were to communities in .ml and lw

          • Ledericas@lemm.ee
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            1
            ·
            4 days ago

            they dont show it on reddit, and we have the r/modsupport how they are constantly complaining, reddit/ and mods arnt being transparent on why people are getting banned. and no rhyme or reason why people are getting banned too.

        • Ledericas@lemm.ee
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          1
          ·
          4 days ago

          sounds like shadowbanned. if you search for the user/(account name) it will tell if the user is suspended, doesnt exist(shadowbanned), even deleted accounts. i checked it that way and it says acct has been deleted.

      • Ledericas@lemm.ee
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        3
        ·
        5 days ago

        this is my first acc on lemmy, i had no idea that was a seperate login. whats ML?

        • irelephant 🍭@lemm.eeOP
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          5
          ·
          4 days ago

          Lemmy has a feature called federation, which means that anyone can setup their own lemmy server and run it how they want, but it will connect to all the other servers, so they share the same posts. lemmy.ml is one server, but it has some tankies who are people who think authoritarian regimes, like soviet russia, were good.

        • Ledericas@lemm.ee
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          1
          ·
          4 days ago

          same here, i thought i had my account details wrong because i dint know i was trying to login to ML, apparenlty theres a lemmy.world too, same issue.

        • volodya_ilich@lemm.ee
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          5
          arrow-down
          5
          ·
          edit-2
          4 days ago

          Lemmy.ml is a lemmy community primarily composed of socialists. Because socialists are highly critical of racist behaviour, white supremacist tropes, US exceptionalism/western chauvinism, imperialist attitudes (many of which bleed in well-meaning liberals), and capitalist countries, they don’t tolerate such things in their community and are very critical when they see such things in other communities, which is often met with distrust and dislike because nobody enjoys being confronted. .ml are very confrontational and they get met with confrontation. There are also some legit problems with a few moderators expressing transphobic beliefs, which is why i personally choose hexbear as my main community. Kinda sad that people here have such a red scare as if it were communists and not fascists in governments all over the western world right now and increasingly so.

          • Ledericas@lemm.ee
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            1
            ·
            4 days ago

            so lemmy.ml is basically some reddit subs, except they probably got banned from reddit for the things you mentioned(banned anyone even if the users align with thier beliefs but disagreed on some things). and came here.

      • volodya_ilich@lemm.ee
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        5
        arrow-down
        9
        ·
        edit-2
        4 days ago

        “Tankie instances” don’t tolerate transphobia or western exceptionalism or Zionism. Lib instances don’t tolerate questioning of US State Department propaganda (been banned from many comms for questioning the validity of Wikipedia articles on geopolitically charged topics) but will tolerate Zionism (downvoted but not banned). I’d rather have the former

        • Ledericas@lemm.ee
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          2
          ·
          edit-2
          4 days ago

          zionism, pro-israeli is probably the worst right now, i was banned r/worldnews temporarily for pointing out who was the sole instigator of the war(BIBI), someone freaked out and said something along the lines, why don you become PM then, and then ranted, (i assume he was the turd that reported me.) normally you can tell who reported you, but i always CHECK my last message, so i know who it is. even “israelis” own population knows he did it, why is it only people outside of the country supporting him.

    • 3dmvr@lemm.ee
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      20
      arrow-down
      1
      ·
      5 days ago

      Its 100% on purpose, those arent the most relevant or highest rated posts, cherrypicked

      • Ledericas@lemm.ee
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        1
        ·
        4 days ago

        they went after the OF accts recently, if people wanted OF porn, they go to non-PH and thier affiliate sites.

    • Pamasich@kbin.earth
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      2
      ·
      4 days ago

      I can only see one of those two posts (the second one) and it’s pretty well reasoned (I don’t agree though, just saying they did provide their reasoning in more than enough words imo). If you’re interested, here’s the link.

      To summarize it:

      • UI worse than New Reddit (I personally agree with it being at least just as bad, that’s why I didn’t go to Lemmy)
      • Big instances are laggy (remember, the post is from 7 months ago not today, so don’t compare the statement to how they are now)
      • Bad mod tools (a common complaint I see about Lemmy)
      • Too much far left and tech focus (another common complaint)
      • It’s not active enough (yet another common complaint)
      • Shitty mods (I disagree with the specific claim made about them being worse than Reddit ones, but I’ve definitely seen at least one shitty mod here so far, and too many are neglectful)
      • Lemmy developers are Maoist (fact iirc)
      • The community is filled with far left extremists, Mao worshippers, dictator bootlickers, and genocide supporters (the one actually unreasonable take imo which indicates they went to the wrong instance)
      • EtherWhack@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        1
        ·
        4 days ago

        The user got banned by the automod in the first one.

        ashenblood 45 points 7 months ago

        You got banned by the automod because your account was less than 24 hours old and you received 40 downvotes on a post. That filter is in place to combat spambots and trolls, because normal users are unlikely to trigger it by getting so many downvotes so soon after making an account

        I messaged the admin and they already unbanned your account. …

        https://www.reddit.com/r/RedditAlternatives/comments/1e0xugs/stay_away_from_lemmy/

    • zephorah@lemm.ee
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      7
      arrow-down
      6
      ·
      5 days ago

      Possibly landed in Hexbear. In combination with Spaz’s purge of all things Lemmy encouraging.

  • BonesOfTheMoon@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    38
    ·
    4 days ago

    It’s so weird to read this, because other than a dork messaging me saying they were going to report me to the FBI I’ve had nothing but a lovely time on Lemmy.

    • CancerMancer@sh.itjust.works
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      18
      ·
      4 days ago

      I will say I have encountered a few highly voted positions that are beyond extreme to the point of stupidity, and I’m a Québecois union executive so that’s wild. Most of that was from Hexbear or .ml tankies though.

        • CancerMancer@sh.itjust.works
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          2
          ·
          4 days ago

          I originally had a part in my comment where I mentioned I have generally enjoyed my time on Lemmy but I accidentally removed it. I do agree with you.

      • Ledericas@lemm.ee
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        2
        ·
        4 days ago

        sometimes its wierd to see some reddit comments that have so much votes, yet the comment itself is obviously wrong, and spammy.

    • aceshigh@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      8
      ·
      4 days ago

      I just don’t respond to hostile comments on Reddit or here. It makes life much easier. It saves me time too - if my comment is 2 sentences and someone replies to me with 2 very lengthy paragraphs, I just pass.

      • Ledericas@lemm.ee
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        1
        ·
        edit-2
        3 days ago

        a paragraph response is just a rant. you have to spend a huge amount of time just thinking about it, and stressing out over it, thats how these people think.

      • BonesOfTheMoon@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        3
        ·
        4 days ago

        Same. I’ll just block and move on. But I really haven’t gotten them here. But other social sites I don’t even reply.

      • Ledericas@lemm.ee
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        1
        ·
        4 days ago

        i just report sometimes, to block them. on reddit, depends on the sub it can backfire if you report and the mod doesnt like it, or they set a filter of how many reports a “user can do before they get banned”

    • Dasus@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      6
      arrow-down
      2
      ·
      4 days ago

      What would the Federal Boob Inspectors want with you? Got a nice pair? I’m jealous.

      • BonesOfTheMoon@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        8
        arrow-down
        1
        ·
        4 days ago

        On Livejournal back in the day you could list interests in your profile, like if you liked music or sports or whatever and you could search each other that way to find new friends. One Christmas an LJ friend had a “naked Christmas party”, where we all posted photos of ourselves naked, so I submitted my first and only topless photo online ever, minus my face, and a bunch of my friends made up an interest category for my “(username) incredible rack”. That was 25 years ago, and I’ll say with modesty that they still look pretty good. That was a fun time.

        • Dasus@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          3
          ·
          4 days ago

          Sounds gorgeous. I’m sure you take good care of your puppies.

          Age is nothing but numbers, love, it’s all in the spirit.

          • BonesOfTheMoon@lemmy.world
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            3
            ·
            4 days ago

            I’m ok with the age. I looked through some of my high school alumni group Facebook page tonight, and i look positively youthful compared to some of my classmates. 50 feels just right to me. And my bewbies still turn heads, I wore a super low cut plunging neckline dress to a restaurant last summer that is practically down to my navel, this ridiculous resort garb dress, and this one guy next to me with another woman couldn’t help but take a long lingering look down my happy valley. And I didn’t mind, because I looked good and I knew it.

            • Dasus@lemmy.world
              link
              fedilink
              arrow-up
              2
              ·
              4 days ago

              Oh yeah, while age is just a number, 50 is the new 30.

              Honestly there are some very attractive 70-year old ladies (oh, sorry, women in their 70’s, even late 70’s) nowadays and when I was younger I don’t think I would’ve said that. I mean, I don’t personally know any, but like celebrities and whatnot. Or at least semi-successful people and not the schizophrenic alcoholics who live in my building.

              And I didn’t mind, because I looked good and I knew it.

              That is the most attractive thing in my opinion. The knowing it part — specifically.

              In my early twenties I went out with girls who I considered very pleasing physically, but lacked self-confidence, and that was a turn-off. Maybe some like the coy maiden sort of personality, but I like a more… feline looking eyes. Ready to pounce, knowing they’ll win. I once had relations with a woman who was back then prolly twice my age, not fit at all, I don’t mean to bodyshame, but… Long story short I didn’t hit on her or she on me really it was a group of girls (some of who were my army mates) and they had this one blond in the back of the large taxi I was driving, so I could only see a shade of a large bosom and a the face covered with a large straw hat, but there were some giggles and half-jokes about paying me in nature and I said yeah sure if they give me 20€ to go along with. Well when we got out of the taxi, I saw she wasn’t… exactly my type. And not in good condition for her type either. Lots of miles on her. And I’m trying to be polite, lol. Anyway, I was stone sober but couldn’t like just back off my word at that point that much, so I just asked her if she mind that I smoked weed before, she didn’t. So we had sex and goddamn it was 20x better than anything with the girls my age who were fit af.

              Sorry for the long and prolly TMI story. It’s five am I may not have all my faculties at this time. Apologies, miss.

              • BonesOfTheMoon@lemmy.world
                link
                fedilink
                arrow-up
                2
                ·
                edit-2
                4 days ago

                It’s ok,I know what you mean. I would honestly rather not have sex anymore because of my circumstances being very difficult, but if I met someone who was interesting and read books and listened to music and dressed well, and took an interest in me and was happy to see me and make an effort to get to know me, and if he was 20 years younger than me, sure why not? As long as he was a good listener about how I like to do it, because I’m different than other women in how I like to get off.

                But this man has overall been a disaster for me, masquerading as someone good, but just really cut from the same cloth as his malignant narcissist mother, which is pretty bad. He accused me tonight of some things that were pretty ugly, and that’s hard. I’d love to spend some time with someone who actually seemed to like me all of the time. I’m writing this while on my Ambien so it’s hard to articulate.

                • Dasus@lemmy.world
                  link
                  fedilink
                  arrow-up
                  2
                  ·
                  4 days ago

                  I haven’t had sex in like four years. Or maybe I stopped counting at four years.

                  It’s not like I’d find it hard to pull in this city, but I’m just not interested and in my current situation I don’t really feel like writing up dating adverts.

                  I got enough of casual sex in my twenties. As in usually a new partner, so the sex was often pretty shit as I think it takes a few times to learn what your partner likes so you can… harmonise.

                  But this man has overall been a disaster for me, masquerading as someone good, but just really cut from the same cloth as his malignant narcissist mother

                  I’ve not dated men but I’m do understand the type you’re talking about.

                  He accused me tonight of some things that were pretty ugly, and that’s hard.

                  Its demeaning and (mildly) traumatising and I’m sure he did it in a way that he reasoned it in some way to make everything implicitly your responsibility as if relationships weren’t two-way.

                  I’ll pop an Ambien to that as well. Should do at this point honestly it’s 5.30 am.

                  Cheers. It’s just under a different brand name here in Finland.

  • socsa@piefed.social
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    31
    arrow-down
    10
    ·
    edit-2
    4 days ago

    I mean any default experience which includes the ml trio is legitimately vile. The sooner Lemmy gets serious about the tankie problem, the better.

    • mojofrododojo@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      11
      arrow-down
      1
      ·
      4 days ago

      I despise the tankies, but imho, stopping them from having their own servers simply pushes them into .world etc. - let them have their safe space, defederated.

      • socsa@piefed.social
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        2
        ·
        edit-2
        3 days ago

        To be clear, I am talking mostly about defederation, but also about a development roadmap which removes them from the critical path. Mostly because I don’t trust them, but also because they make building an open source community that much more difficult. I have a bunch of accounts on various Lemmy instances but I’ve made piefed my home for now because it represents a path away from tankie adjacent development.

    • desktop_user@lemmy.blahaj.zone
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      6
      arrow-down
      3
      ·
      4 days ago

      “Lemmy” is just a bunch of protocols, what individuals use those protocols for should be irrelevant to the underlying protocols.

    • Dogyote@slrpnk.net
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      6
      arrow-down
      6
      ·
      4 days ago

      Bah, don’t be a weiner. They sometimes have good points. Keyword is sometimes. It’d be a community disservice to remove their perspective from the mileau.

  • whencanweplay@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    50
    ·
    edit-2
    5 days ago

    Ima be real everyone is kissing lemmys ass but… I mean, it feels like reddit? Which is good?

    Feels no different from reddit so far lol it’s not better or worse, really

    • torrentialgrain@lemm.ee
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      23
      arrow-down
      1
      ·
      5 days ago

      New here but so far it feels like Reddit used to feel 10 years ago - a bit less populated maybe.

    • SkyezOpen@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      23
      arrow-down
      3
      ·
      5 days ago

      The top comment on reddit is always a stupid fucking joke or pun. Not so on lemmy. That’s the biggest difference I notice when I go back to look at reddit. On popular posts the whole first 3 threads are inane bullshit.

      • JimmyMcGill@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        9
        arrow-down
        1
        ·
        4 days ago

        “I also chose this guys dead wife”…

        Like the inside jokes were really good on Reddit like the switcheroo one, or the guy that always had that whole comment that ended in the wrestling scene but most of them were just repeated to death

    • ManOMorphos@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      1
      arrow-down
      1
      ·
      4 days ago

      Here, your comment doesn’t get completely buried if you make one on a popular post. Part of that is the lack of heavy volume, of course, but I also feel like the sorting is more favorable to less upvoted comments.